SludgeCorp: "Okay, our bad"

ANYTOWN (RDMU) - In an admission startling to absolutely no one,

Anytown industrial stalwart SludgeCorp has confirmed the monster

eating Anytown is, indeed, its creation.

"What can I say?" asked SludgeCorp CEO Dr. Silas Sludge. "We

thought you couldn't handle the truth about the bio-phenomenon.

You say you can. Okay, our bad."

The creature, code-named Shockenaw by the company, is a prototype

bio-weapon which has, evidently, grown larger and more quickly

than SludgeCorp anticipated.

"We figured about man-sized, at most," said Dr. Sludge. "It just

kind of got away from the figurative and literal senses."

The creature has killed nearly 5,000 people so far and destroyed

half of the town.

Its current whereabouts are unknown, though authorities believe

it's headed to the Southside, where an evacuation is underway.

(Copyright 2011 RDMU. All rights reserved.)